You And Me Both
by The Interference
Summary: Katsuki is madly in love with Deku. He'll do anything to protect him. And of course, Izuku will do the same... if only Kacchan is his. (Canon events with a twist. I present you: the Mutual Yandere AU.)
1. Chapter 1

"K-Kacchan," Izuku whimpers warily. He keeps retreating in slow steps, unknowingly trapping himself against the concrete wall.

"Quiet," Katsuki snarls. With a sudden move performs a maneuver and Izuku flinches back in surprise.

_ Kacchan's gotten fast-! _

An elbow buries itself into his stomach - it makes his eyes water in pain, his sour saliva to fill his mouth, his eyes to pop out.

It leaves an ache -and probably a bruise- just below where his sternum should be, the little hollow beneath the middle of his ribcage.

He topples over in pretense, feigning unbearable agony. He buys time. Kacchan doesn't like fighting someone incapacitated. Izuku would like to finish this as peacefully as possible.

_ 'After all,' _ he muses in worry. _ 'Kacchan needs some rest. I hope he doesn't strain himself too much, training all the time.' _

It was what started this recent argument anyway.

Kacchan kept training harder and harder, so much that Izuku began worrying incessantly. Every waking moment was full of Katsuki and possible injuries he could get from overworking and excessive exercise. Izuku had confronted him about it, but nothing had come out of his initiative.

"You think I'm fragile, huh?!" Katsuki leans into his trembling form on the ground, until all Izuku could see was Kacchan's furious scowl. "That I can't handle it - is that right?! I don't need **_you _**to protect me, you damn Quirkless crybaby!"

"I KNOW-" Izuku twitches up from where he lies, wheezing. "I know. Just…"

Katsuki crouches over him, his pissed-off expression easing into a dispassionate one. He waits for Izuku to articulate his words.

Gah. Izuku can't stay mad at him at all. Kacchan is so pretty. When he doesn't frown he looks like a charming prince.

"Well? Speak up, Deku. Just _ what _."

"Ah - I get scared you're going to injure yourself, Kacchan, you would have to stay in a hospital. Then you would have to catch up on your studies-"

"Haaah?! You sayin' I'm _ dumb, _Deku?!"

"N-Not at all…!"

Katsuki tires of him. He stands back abruptly, with Izuku still laying on the cold hard ground. The shivering boy sways as he tries to get up, but Katsuki shoves him down again.

"I'm going," Kacchan informs him. Izuku gives the slightest nod. "I better not find you getting in my way again."

Izuku hesitates. On one hand he'd like to keep Kacchan safe, on the other hand he'd like to protect the amiable air between them. Damned if you do, damned if you don't.

He sighs. He caves in, nodding.

Kacchan glares apathetically. Finally deciding Izuku's promise is enough, he turns on his feet and leaves the dead-end alley.

Izuku leans against the damp wall, panting. That was close. Izuku doesn't want to lose his hard-earned rapport with Kacchan. Years has gone into his bond with his explosive friend, he'd rather not screw up everything just because Kacchan is being stupid.

He covers his face with his hands, rubbing a bit.

_ Kacchan. _

He is so handsome, so clever. So dedicated. Izuku loves that about him.

But most of all, Izuku loves that Kacchan's **_his._ **

_ The love of his life, his image of victory. _

* * *

"It's time to think _ seriously _about your futures!"

_ What do you mean? I've always been serious. To never ever leave Kacchan and be the one to stand beside him at all times, that's the dream I've always had…! _

"HAH?! You think you _ extras _ are going to enter **_UA?!_ ** " Kacchan bellows at their classmates around. With a dash of adrenaline and conceit, he hops onto the desk with one cool move, "I _ aced _ the mock test! My Quirk surpasses any other! I'm a _ natural _ , and you side characters think you can _ get into UA? _ Don't make me laugh!"

"Oh yeah," the Hamada-sensei cuts in carelessly. "Midoriya applied there too, didn't he?"

Izuku covers behind his worn down notebook, trying to shield himself from the mocking laughter and Kacchan's angry, _ angry _gaze.

_ No, I - I'm sorry Kacchan! Please, please don't look at me like that! I take it back! I won't come to UA! Anything for you, _**_anything…!_ **

* * *

_ Deku. _

Katsuki's heart lurches in agony, beating through his worry and fear.

Quirkless little Deku, the small boy in their group, the meek kid always loitering a feet behind, _ the love of his life- _

_ Deku. _

All this effort to keep him away from such danger, Villains, abductions, torture, blackmail, and who knows what _ evils _…

All shattered in front of his eyes, fragments drifting away from him, until all that's left is him, his twinging heart, and that ungrateful, lovable boy: Deku.

_ Deku. _

Katsuki's plans, all gone in a manner of seconds, in mere four words. He can see it now, like a movie he can watch through his retinas; Deku's bright start at life, his excited ramblings in their childhood, the hand holdings and flower crowns, sharing their beds, their showers, their bentos and whatever they had…

...now has no meaning. Deku would throw it all away at the prospect of something as dirty as **_Heroism._ **

Deku. Dying at the hands of a petty Villain. Dying as he is tortured to death by a criminal organization's leader. _ Dying, _his life turned around, snuffed out as if it had never existed at all.

"You think _ you _ can enter UA, _ Deku?" _Katsuki taunts, desperate to make him see the truth of Heroes, the pain and risks. "The Quirkless little boy with noodle arms? The Quirkless little boy who has no idea how to fight? The tiny fuck who can't even fend off some street dogs?"

"That - That was _ one time _…!"

"Shut the fuck up, Deku. You traitor; you can't go to UA, shrimp! You don't even have a Quirk!"

"They got rid of that rule though!" Deku whimpers, scooting back into the wall, trapping himself in.

Katsuki doesn't care at all, he _ doesn't care, _ as long as he can convince this moron to step aside and _ let Katsuki protect him, as he should. _

_ "Don't go to UA." _

* * *

It's after-hours. Izuku finishes up with his latest entry in the notebook number thirteen, when some of Kacchan's lackeys approach.

"Yo, Midoriya," Kusanabe greets, informal despite his dislike of him. "Whatcha got there?"

Fuji swipes the worn notebook from his hands before Izuku can even respond, raising an eyebrow in a mocking fashion.

"Damn," he whistles, amused. "Didn't know you were _ that _stupid. You still going about this Hero business? Give it up, man! It's useless!"

"It's not!"

_ "What's that." _

**_Kacchan._ **

Izuku deflates, every nerve in his body screaming that Kacchan has caught him, that he would end their friendship _ right here and then. _He wants to scramble away, to hide what he can; but Kacchan is already grabbing the source of his anxiety in his strong, deft hands.

Izuku watches him stare, unsure and afraid. If Kacchan asks it of him, clearly and with utmost determination, he will give it _ all _ up. Without any hesitation or pause, all for Kacchan's love.

(If there is any.)

"What's this, Deku?" Kacchan whispers, eyes wide and palms trembling, slick with nitroglycerin. It stains the cover, and stains the pages as the handsome boy goes through all that's written. His eyebrows furrow, displaying his inner state.

But he's quiet, so _ quiet. _Izuku doesn't think he's ever seen him so silent. Kacchan's never quiet.

And Izuku is frightened of such a state, frightened that he's angered Kacchan so much that he's driven him to silence. He hopes Kacchan won't distance himself.

"Tell me."

"My Hero notes, Kacchan."

"_ Hero notes?" _ Kacchan repeats back. Still quiet, still incredulous, as if unbelieving. "Hero notes? You call these _ Hero notes, _ Deku? I call these **_trash. _**I should put it where it belongs." Izuku is about to move, to cry for Kacchan to be rational, but his love stops in his tracks. A sickly bitter grimace makes it way to his beautiful face, "Or better yet, I should make this food for the fish."

The notebook goes up in flames, singed until the cover is merely a black background, and the pages nearly turn to ash. With a careless, shaking wrist flick, Kacchan throws it out of the window.

Izuku _ doesn't care, _ he _ doesn't care at all. _ Kacchan could do _ anything, _ he could scream, he could fight, he could curse, he could go quiet, he could get mad, he could _ kill him, _but Izuku would love him until the end of the world.

But this hits pretty close to home.

_ 'You have the extra toe-joint-' _

_ 'I'm sorry, Izuku!' _

_ 'Can I be a Hero?' _

_ 'No, that wasn't what I wanted you to say…' _

_ 'What I wanted you to say was -' _

**_"You can't be a Hero, Deku," Kacchan says. He looks desperate to prove it. He looks feral. "You will never be a Hero. Not on my watch. Never."_ **

Kacchan.

* * *

Izuku stares at him with such _ anger, _ with such _ betrayal, _that Katsuki actually reconsiders his actions.

Had he gone too far? Deku has never wilted under his cruel words, despite the severity of them. So Katsuki hadn't attempted to curb his anger towards him. If it was bad, Deku would surely tell him! He never hesitates to do so.

But this was an _ emergency. _ Katsuki couldn't merely sit back and _ watch _ as Deku got onto the path that would _ kill _him one day.

_ Not on my watch. You're never going to be a Hero. _

His work here was done for now. Deku wouldn't listen to anything else he said after this.

"By the way," he says. He almost wants to jab at his Quirklessness, as a way to remind him, but Katsuki knows he did that one too many times. He had a ruthless taunt in the back of his mind, but he couldn't bring himself to use something so terrible for his darling Deku's sunshine nature. It would _ wound _him.

So he goes on without provoking him, "Go cry after this. If you keep it in you'll just cry in class tomorrow or something."

Izuku's slight, cut-off sob is like a sign that he was right, so he exits the class without looking back.

* * *

Stupid Kacchan. _ Stupid Kacchan! _

But he was kind too. He told him to cry! Kacchan's knew him so well, to predict he would be burnt out after an experience like this.

He really loves Kacchan! His driven, ambitious Kacchan…

_ 'Give it up.' _

_ Okay _.

Okay.

He will. For Kacchan.

After exiting the classroom, Izuku goes to the pond on the school grounds to check for his fried notebook. He finds it being munched on by the koi fish, tearing apart at the corners.

"Stupid fish," he mutters, irritated. "You can't do that, it's not yours. It's mine."

He pulls it out of the water, soaked wholly. "It's mine."

He checks to see if he could still turn the pages, but they fall apart at his touch, ripped. "It's mine."

"It's mine," he whispers, nearly silent, mouth moving minimally.

It's silent around. If Izuku screames, no one would hear. If he smashes his head on the pool's corner, no one would realize until morning, or until someone checks during the night.

He can die here.

_ Kacchan. _

**No.**

He can't. He can't do that to Kacchan. He can't betray Kacchan like that!

He can't do that! He needs to stand by Kacchan first!

With that last affirmation, his resolve is strengthened like nothing else. His conviction is strong, held up by the pillars that area is love for Kacchan and the dream of All Might. With this, he would become a Hero who saves everyone with a smile!

_ But Kacchan. _

Kacchan told him to give up.

Izuku tightens his clenching fists, about to cry from the battle inside him.

Can he go against Kacchan? Even if it's to _ stand _by him? To be with him until the end? To support him in his dream?

To love him?

Would Kacchan reject him?

Would Kacchan push him away?

_ 'Kacchan is mine. I'm the only one who loves him as he should be, the only one who knows him the way I do, the only one who can go up to him and walk back with no injuries or scarring remarks. Kacchan takes care of me in his own way. And I love him.' _

And that's that. Even if Izuku was rejected, it would be because Kacchan didn't know that he actually _ needed _ Izuku, that Izuku would move the _ skies _for him. Once Izuku made him see the true scope of his feelings, Kacchan would have no doubts.

_ Kacchan is mine. You're the one I love, Kacchan! _

_ I'm going to stand by you as you become the greatest Hero ever seen! Not even _**_you _**_ can stop me_


	2. oof here we go again

_I shouldn't have,' _went through his mind as he was assaulted by the giant mass of slime. _'This is where I die, I fucked up!' _

He was going to blackout, his lungs ran low, and his heart slowed down like a hopeless dog.

_I can't die like this…! _

The sludge filled his mouth, shooting straight into his throat.

_I haven't told Kacchan yet! _

**_And his protests stutter at the weakness overtaking his body._ **

**_Bravery._ **

**_Noble aspirations._ **

**_Ambitions._ **

**_Hope._ **

**_Faith._ **

**_His sheer, encompassing love._ **

**_None of them have worth in the face of death._ **

**_And his dreams-_ **

**_-fade away like a leaf in the wind._ **

* * *

And he woke up. And he drowned again, All Might's words ringing like a static buzz in his brain. All sounds became white noise.

**_"No," the withered man rasps. He cheekbones protrude and his eyes are sunken. His bones peek from beneath his skin. And the angry rouge of his wrecked torso smiles at him. Cruel._ **

**_"You can't be a Hero, Midoriya-shounen."_ **

_'But I _**_love_ **_ Kacchan,' _he thought, crying silently on the way home. _'Can't I stay with him? Is he going to take it away too? I love you, Kacchan. I wish I could stay with you!' _

"Damn, that's some Villain. What's going on?"

"Looks like he's got a hostage, a kid from middle school or something."

" _Seriously?" _

Izuku's world sharpened. He stared from behind the crowd gathered at the street entrance.

He watched the sludge.

_'I did this,' _bounced around his head, adding to the chaos. _'I did this, and someone's going to die.' _

The hostage -

_'I did this.' _

The boy struggled in that slick grip.

_'It's my fault.' _

His red, _red _eyes captured Izuku's gaze, and Izuku couldn't look away from his Kacchan. His Kacchan's fear.

**_'And someone's going to die. And I will be the one killing.'_ **

* * *

Katsuki, at his deepest, was a fucking **_coward._ **

And he knew this intimately.

Why else would he become a Hero? If he wasn't afraid of Deku getting caught up in something dangerous, he would have been a doctor or something. Whatever. It wasn't like he had any aspirations aside from his future with Deku.

_But ever since that _**_fucking All Might video-_ **

Something had snapped in Izuku. And Katsuki had seen it. _And he drowned in it. _**_And he drowned in his rage._ **

_How could All Might dare to _**_steal _**_Izuku from him? _Didn't he know Izuku was the light in this monotonous grey life?

Katsuki was never going to forgive that man. For _ever _ taking Izuku away from his side.

**_After this shitshow, Katsuki was going to order a set of handcuffs, a full-neck collar, and a ball and chain. He would lock Deku up in a baby-proof, windowless room donned with security cameras and a silk futon._ **

For him, there had never been a fantasy superior to securing Deku's safety forever, leaving that weak boy at Katsuki's mercy.

_And then this happens. _

_"Ooh, prime vessel! Jackpot!" _

_'The fuck-' _

And before he could even make the tiniest spark, he had been engulfed head to toe. His arms and legs deep in the sludge, his mouth covered by the ridiculous teeth of this _pathetic lowlife… _

It was lower than low. For the first time in his life, Katsuki doubted his chances. His explosions were ineffective in the slime body of the Villain. He was in the way of the Heroes.

_'I'm so… I'm so weak! No wonder Deku tried to help me!' _

Then, with cold realization streaming over him like a heavy downpour, Katsuki realized that these would be the final moments of his life. He was going to die. The sludge would wear his skin, and he would be no more than a puppet on strings.

_'Izuku would cry. I can't… _**_Izuku.'_ **

The love of his life, left alone in this horrible, shit-ridden world?

Katsuki's struggles began anew; terrified at the thought of leaving Izuku without protection, without support.

_'I need to live, I need to live…For Izuku, for him, for him, _**_FOR HIM! Let go!'_ **

Then he saw him. Those eyes; those frightened, _angry _ eyes. Izuku stared at him, frozen.

Katsuki hated himself, he **_loathed. _**Because as the moment of fury passed, Izuku shot toward him.

**_No._ **

**_You can't. Stop. Run away. What are you doing? Why are you running to me? Why would you run to someone so pathetic?_ **

He watched, helpless as the reason of his existence threw himself into the road under fire.

**_I'm_** **_weak! I can't even protect you!_**

Izuku ran to him, his face a mishmash of desperation and fright.

**_You're so scared, yet you're trying to be a Hero, Deku?! Save yourself, dumbass!_ **

"KACCHAN!" Deku shrieked, taking off his backpack and hurling it across the distance between.

And, by some miracle, the thing let go of Katsuki's mouth.

He began retching instantly, trying to spit out whatever he had ingested.

"Fucking _Deku!" _Katsuki shouted. He couldn't bear watching the other try and claw his way in. "What the hell?! Run away!"

"I can't!" came the answering cry. Izuku was crying. He always cried. "I can't leave you to die!"

**_'Are you okay? Do you need help-'_ **

_'I don't need your help! Go away! Stop looking at me _**_like that!'_ **

The slimy fist was going to smash them both in. Katsuki would die covering his love from the worst of the damage, and he would die ensuring Deku _lived. _It was the best death he could imagine.

_But why does it feel so bad? _

The fist descends. The world slows down. Katsuki braces himself for his end.

The fist stops. A mighty punch blows it away.

_'...Eh?' _

"Young man," the Hero's voice reaches them both. Izuku turns to All Might under Katsuki's heavy form. Katsuki stubbornly refuses to even _glance _at that **_wretched _**man. The one who stole Izuku's safety in one fell swoop.

"I should have lived up to my lecture! PLUS… ULTRA…!" All Might's voice booms over the whole area, decimating the flimsy sludge into even smaller slime.

_Peh. Take your cringy Plus Ultra and kindly fuck out, old man. Izuku needs _**_me. _**_Not you. _

Droplets rain on them; Katsuki takes the brunt of the sudden downpour, which was apparently caused my All Might's extra super punch.

_Okay that's a bit cool. I still hate you. _

But he has to keep Deku warm. If the little fuck gets hypothermia from a little drizzle, Katsuki will kill him _himself. _Armed with his murderous and loving feelings, Katsuki covers Deku with him thicker arms.

"K - Kacchan," Izuku whines from beneath his makeshift umbrella. Katsuki can feel a blush fighting to rise up his cheeks as Deku _keeps fucking squirming. _What the fuck. So freaking cute. He's like… some little baby chick. A small cat. A large bunny. Any little soft pet. All Katsuki's to protect and love. "It's raining!"

"You realized that _now, _shithead?"

"Eh -" Izuku sneezes, making a tiny squeal. Katsuki feels like dying. "- ah, but it's true? And… Oh God! You were taken hostage! _Kacchan! _Are you hurt?!"

"What -" Deku seemingly takes that bemused reactive sound as a confirmation because he's suddenly _everywhere. _He touches Katsuki's face, presses against his chest, checks his abdomen, _then fucking grabs his chin and opens Katsuki's mouth. _

"Say 'ah', Kacchan," Izuku supplies unhelpfully as he stares at Katsuki's mouth like he has no other job to do.

Does Deku like his mouth?

Katsuki has to admit, the thought hadn't occurred to him before this instance. It's not like Izuku made a habit of touching Katsuki so… _liberally. _So naturally. But Katsuki likes it. It can stay.

Well, _the mouth- _

Now, he isn't so sure about that. But if his precious Deku wanted, he would do _anything _for him.

Including, though not limited to… this mouth thing. Maybe Katsuki is wrong plus lucky and Deku was just interested in his lips, like a usual person might be. Katsuki can do that better. He knows how to do lips. He can pout if his adorable love wants him to. Easy peasy. Like taking the candy from a kid and whatever the fuck that is.

"Oh, seems you're fine!" Izuku announces as Katsuki goes through the whole stages of grief in five seconds flat. Izuku leanes away, leaving the warmth and security of Katsuki's arms. Also, conveniently leaving the taller of the pair bereft of his (unofficial) charge.

"Idiot!" he shouts suddenly, scaring the nearby Heroes and Izuku himself. "The fuck were you running for?! HUH?! Ya wanna die, you dummy?!"

"AHHH NO KACCHAN I DON'T WANNA DIE…!"

"THEN DON'T FUCKING DO THAT AGAIN!"


	3. na na na na na-

Katsuki can't sleep.

He tosses and turns under his stuffy covers, breathless under the constricting cloth.

Finally, he dozes off into a fitful dream…

* * *

_What would Katsuki do, had he gotten his hands on Deku? Permanently? _

**_Well, he has many options._ **

_ Let's see some. _

* * *

_His biggest fantasy was a memory he enjoyed replaying, over and over again. _

_ Already well into the school year, he had been the most popular student of this shitty primary school. The teachers fell over their feet to bow down to his wants, bendable like rubber bands. His classmates praised him to the heavens. _

_ But this all depended on whether Katsuki was in a bad or good mood. _

_ In a good mood, Katsuki was moderately explosive. He had nothing to lash out for. It was _**_peaceful._ **

**_Then, the day he saw Deku getting bullied, he got into a really bad mood._ **

* * *

_Anger. _

_ Anger so hot it burns through your flesh, then crawls agonizingly into your tendons, then dries your bones to ash - it is the type Katsuki feels almost constantly, each hour of the day and well into the week. _

_ It is the type he feels when he sees someone _**_touching that one._ **

_ The one that is _**_his. _**_ Midoriya Izuku. _

_ But there's one thing that unleashes his rage even worse. _

_ Because if they fucking _**_touch him-_ **

_ Katsuki will rip their eyes out of those holes, sew shut their mouth, maim whatever appendage they touched him with and _**_pour _**_ fucking _**_salt_ **_ in the exposed, bleeding meat. _

_ Hm. Maybe he'll splash some alkali or acid as well. If they die, it's even better. They'd deserve it. _

_ Because if anyone hurts Deku's _**_pinky, _**_ much less what these morons did, they'd _**_get butchered into julienne strips._ **

_ ...if only he could get the opportunity to _**_murder _**_ them for once and for all, instead of their dream-selves. _

* * *

_Katsuki found them _**_shoving Deku around._ **

_ As if they had the fucking _**_right-_ **

_ "Oi, _**_Deku_ **_ ," the oldest of the boys drawled out _**_real_ **_ smug. "I heard you pissed on yourself in class, like in first year!" _

_ "N - No!" Deku shouted, shaking like a leaf. One of them grabbed his arms behind his back. "No! I - I didn't! It was water! I'm sorry!" _

_ "Eh? Sure, and I'm All Might. You're such a fucking scaredy-cat, I bet you'd jump if you saw your shadow!" _

_ His lackeys began chortling at that terrible joke while Katsuki's whole body quivered. _

_ Boy, he was _**_mad._ **

_ So mad that, he could maybe be kind enough _**_turn their whole skin purple with the bruises-_ **

_ He lunged at the biggest one with his palms sweating excessively, sparks popping off at the anticipation of scorching his targets. _

_ His hand found its mark on the boy's neck, setting off an explosion that might have been dangerous enough to blow the guy's head off, had Katsuki been less than perfect. The blow sizzled on the fragile skin, but stayed mild as a warning. _

_ The boy stumbled away in shrieks, the clumsy imbalance turning into a crazed sprint when he saw who his assailant was. _

_ Katsuki grinned, a savage feeling of bloodthirst expanding deep within his ribcage, beating in time with his heart. The heart that beat for the one who watched him. _

**_Watch me, Deku. I'm killing these pathetic bullies that hurt you. Aren't you grateful? Don't you feel as if you might float from the happiness? Love me, Deku. Be mine. Let me protect you, so you have nothing to be scared of._ **

_ "It's - It's Bakugou!" the lowlifes howled. Before Katsuki could issue his punishment, they turned heel and escaped, just like their cowardly leader. _

_ "Tch," Katsuki said. He should have been more furious but with Deku with him, he couldn't muster the effort to drown himself in anger again. _

_ Pushing his hand into his pocket, he extended the other to the boy lying on the pavement. _

_ "Come on," he said, shaking the hand into Deku's face. "Ain't ya gonna get up, Deku? You can't sit forever, you know." _

_ Yuck. Katsuki was the least romantic person in this world. If only he knew whether Deku would be receptive to his affections… _

_ Deku's bottom lip trembled, mesmerizing Katsuki in its pink color, "K - Kacchan, thank you so much! __ I'm so glad!" _

_ Katsuki lit up in glee at his words, at the words he was so desperately hoping for. He preened under the admiring gaze, sticking out his chest with pride. _

_ "Yup," he said, smug in his victory. "I saved you, Deku. Didn't I?" _

_ "You did!" _

_ "You know what comes now?" Katsuki asked, breathing speeding up at the thought of what he was attempting now. "Well?" _

_ "I -" Deku averted his eyes, shy. "... No. I'm sorry." _

_ Stupid Deku. It was okay. Katsuki would teach him everything he needed to learn. _

_ "I saved you," he explained patiently. "That means I'm the Hero, right?" _

_ Deku's face shifted from confusion to enlightenment, nodding enthusiastically with stars in his eyes. _

_ Katsuki was enjoying this _**_so much._ **

_ Grinning, he continued, "So you're the damsel. I'm your Hero! You should give me a kiss if you're so grateful!" _

_ And as Deku's eyes went wide, Katsuki rethought his actions. Was this… Was this alright? Was he going too far? Would Deku refuse? Would Deku run away from him? _

**_No. I won't let you out, Deku. You're mine. You'll always be mine. There's nowhere to run away._ **

_ " _**_Kacchan_ **_ ," Deku breathed out in wonder, staring speechless at Katsuki. "I… Of course. For you! Could you… please bend down a bit?" _

_ "Moron," Katsuki said as his heart went crazy in his chest, jumping around between his lungs like an excited rabbit. _

_ As he obeyed his love and leaned in, "I'm doing this 'cause it's _**_tradition, _**_ you know? The Hero gets a kiss if they save the victim." _

_ "O - Oh," Izuku intoned, voice strange. "That's… I understand, Kacchan." _

_ Katsuki nodded along, too distracted by the pucker of Deku's pretty lips to pay attention to what he was saying. They came closer and closer to his face and a new anxiety was discovered inside him. _

_ Was Deku going to kiss his cheek? _

**_Or his mouth?_ **

_ Katsuki started sweating in response to the last thought, his breath hitching as he imagined what that would be like. He wasn't ready at all! That was what _**_couples _**_ did, right?! Those… Those lips touching _**_his lips…_ **

_ Then, suddenly, Deku pecked his cheek just near his mouth and dashed away into the street. _

_ Katsuki stood there, reeling from the combination of his imagination and the actual experience of Deku's lips anywhere near him. _

**__ "That-" Shivering from the goosebumps, Katsuki stomped his feet in his anger. "That shitty brat! That wasn't a fucking kiss, Deku! That was _**_barely _**_ a touch!" __**

* * *

_The second one is one that came from a dream. _

_ Katsuki couldn't remember much, but he remembered the _**_sounds._ **

_ The _**_feelings._ **

_ "Kacchan," Deku had panted, right into his ear. Katsuki could feel the sensation of their bodies pressing together tight. A set of arms encircled his neck, patting the back of his head. "Kacchan, _**_I love you so much_ **_ ." _

_ Katsuki was so happy, so _**_whole, _**_ he could die from the warmth of them existing together. _

_ "We can stay here, alone, forever," he had continued, pleasure wrecking his voice. Katsuki embraced him snugly, dying a bit from how beautiful Deku was like this. _**_His. _**_ "You take care of me so _**_well. _**_ I'll never ever leave you, Kacchan!" _

_ Katsuki had woken up to a lonely bed, but the memory of his dream stayed. It kept him from crying when he realized he had never had the one he wanted the most. _

**_One day._ **

* * *

_The third one was a half cooked idea. _

_ "A basement is too much for that," Katsuki theorized. "Somewhere on ground level is better. What if there was an emergency? Wait. I'd never allow that. Right. Silly me. The top level of a long-ass skyscraper works too." _

**_Hmm… Where to keep you, Deku?_ **

_ "Chains," Katsuki piped up out of the blue. "Yes. That's good. Chains. Not too heavy though. I can get an iron ball for that. The chains should be softer. What if Deku's skin _**_chafes_ **_ ?" _

_ That'd be _**_horrible. _**_ Deku could cry. _**_Cry! _**_ Katsuki wouldn't know how to handle that and Deku would be _**_disappointed _**_ in him. What if he wanted to leave? _

_ "Idiot," Katsuki said out loud. "That's why I'm planning this fucking thing. Get your ass in gear." _

_ His _**_plan_ **_ , as it was, was buying the top floor of a one-hundred-and-ninety-meter tall skyscraper and donning it with the best security cameras. Then, when he was satisfied with the safety, he would cuff Deku's ankles, tied to an iron ball with a sturdy chain. _

_ It was a sloppy design, but it filled Katsuki with so much _**_joy._ **

**_Do you see, Deku? How much happiness your safety gives me? Give up your hopeless dreams, and I'll love you forever._ **

_ If only. _

* * *

_Something weird is going on. _

_ "Kacchan," Deku's voice whispers, so utterly quiet in the silence. "Oh, I wish you could see you. So pretty. All mine. _**_Asleep. _**_ I wonder what you would do if you knew I was here… watching you…" _

_ Katsuki is disoriented. He has never felt so out of place in his dreams. What is going on? _

_ "Looks like it's time to part," Deku speaks, hushed. He sound of clothing rustling reaches Katsuki's ears. "I will come back another day. When I can't wait anymore. Goodbye, Kacchan. Sweet dreams." _

__ And, as though a last-minute thought, " _**_I love you_ **_ ." __

* * *

When Katsuki wakes up, he's staring into the ceiling in bemusement, eyebrows furrowed. The comforter is off him.

_ 'I remember a dream,' _ the thoughts rush through his mind. He grasps hungrily at the remnants of his memory, as if he can catch them before they disappear altogether. _ 'There was Deku. He was… What was he doing? Whatever. Regular dream. Maybe we were getting ice cream.' _

No, that's not it. But for the life of him, Katsuki can't remember what.

_ 'Whatever.' _

It is the fated day.

It is the UA entrance exam.

**_You will see, Deku. I'll prove it to you. I'm enough to protect both of us, why are you still fighting me on this? Just give up!_ **

And Deku, like the idiot he is, decided entering the Hero course exam was a good idea.

**What am I going to do with that little shit?**

* * *

It's today. Izuku is going to _ prove _it to Kacchan.

**_I can stand by you, Kacchan. I can be yours just as you're mine! We can be equals. From now on, I will pursue you in your dream!_ **

_ 'Yes,' _ Izuku muses in pleasure. _ 'That's just what I long for! And it's _**_today_ **_ !' _

All Might had been an excellent mentor. He had made sure Izuku worked himself to the ground, battered but stronger for it. In the end, he had developed some _ very nice _muscles and gotten a pretty cool Quirk!

Though, he wonders if Kacchan would approve. He is definitely the big, sinewy type of guy. What if he doesn't like Izuku losing his fragile body?

_ 'Well,' _ Izuku ponders as he walks to the gates. _ 'My muscles can be turned into fat by lack of exercise. Then, if Kacchan dislikes that as well, I can exercise a bit to burn the excess off. It'll be easy! I won't disappoint Kacchan!' _

"Get out of my way, _ Deku," _comes from behind him and Izuku flinches in surprise when he realizes it's his crush. "Or I'll kill you."

Izuku turns around to look, jumping back when he realized Kacchan is in a bad mood.

Maybe his secret visit last night had something to do with that?

Oh no. Oh _ no. _

**_What if he remembers it?!_ **

This is bad. It's really bad! If Kacchan reports him…

_ 'It's over. I'm dead now. I'll go to prison for stalking and breaking and entering and then Kacchan will _**_hate _**_ me because he loathes his privacy breached-' _

"Nerd, I'm telling _ you," _ Kacchan repeats, flicking Izuku's forehead. There is an unpleasant expression on his face. "What are you thinking that makes it okay to fucking _ ignore _me, huh?!"

Maybe… Maybe Kacchan doesn't remember…?

But that is simply… _ marvelous. _Izuku would love to see another day-ful of Kacchan.

"Sorry, Kacchan," he mumbles, messing his hair out of habit. "Good morning! I'll make sure not to get in your way!"

"Hah, what a joke. _ Get in my way, _you think you're so high and mighty?"

"N - No! Of course not! I could never be as great as you!"

But then, as a cruel twist of fate, Izuku trips over his own feet, body descending to the concrete ground in slow motion.

_ 'This is it,' _ he decides as the ground approaches. _ 'This is how I die. Being an idiot around Kacchan, just before sitting the most important exam in my life.' _

But then.

* * *

_'This is it, Katsuki,' _ he realizes with excitement. _ 'This is your chance! When life gives your future husband a stumble, you make use of it! Go on - arms under him! Sweep him up!' _

But then.

But then, **_this bitch comes and stops his fall._ **

**_You're dead. You're so fucking dead. Who the fuck do you think you are, Fat Face? I'll roast you into baked chicken. That's how dead and finished you are. Fucking opportunistic nosy bitch-_ **

Deku hovers in the air for a moment, righting himself in a short time.

"Oh, sorry about that," the girl apologizes, because _ yeah, bitch. Apologize to _**_me. _**_ I was gonna break his fall and take him on a date and live happily ever after on our one-hundred-and-ninety-meter skyscraper. _"I shouldn't have used my Quirk, but it's bad luck to fall on the day of the exam, right? Good luck!"

Smiling sweetly - Eugh. - she leaves them behind, Katsuki fuming in irritation and Deku staring after her.

"Fucking bitch," Katsuki curses, turning to Deku. "You shit -"

Then he trails off.

Deku. He looks dumbstruck, blinking endearingly at the girl's back.

**_DEKU YOU FUCKING CHEATING BASTARD-_ **

Katsuki's irritation levels up from moderate annoyance to _ hell-fucking-fire _**_wrath _**in the span of three seconds flat. He grabs Deku by the shoulder and presses their foreheads together.

He feels more settled when he notices Deku's light gasp, but continues nonetheless.

"From now on," Katsuki starts, about to spew out some nonsensical drivel. He feels faint at the intensity of Deku's emerald gaze. "You're my fucking rival. I'll beat you so you can _ learn _ that you've got no place among Heroes. And if you **_dare _** look away from me -" Here, he snarls in bestial rage. "- _ I'll make sure you regret it. _"

He steps away, walking to the building without glancing back.

He hopes Deku is behind there; following Katsuki, cheering for him, admiring him, staring at him, longing for him.

Loving him.

**_Love me. Love me so much you have no time to look away from me. Need me like I need you._ **

**_Don't even think about going after that bitch, Deku. _**

**_I'll kill her if you do._ **

* * *

**_Kacchan is so driven. He's such a Hero._ **

Izuku is left to watch his childhood friend's back as he goes. Standing there, he muses about the first bit of friendly conversation he made.

_ 'A girl didn't make fun of me…!' _

And Kacchan.

Oh, _ Kacchan. _

He's so dashing, so charming. So cool. So amazing.

The way he was staring at Izuku earlier - it gave him the most delightful shivers. He could feel his eyes roving over him like hands, almost physical in sensation.

Heart pumping steadily, he strides forward into the building.

**_Kacchan. _**

**_Do you know how much I love you?_ **


	4. aw shit whump

"Oh," Izuku says, disappointment obvious on his face. "We aren't in the same area."

"Shut up," Kacchan hisses. His eyes are on Present Mic and the zero pointer robot on the wall.

A feeling takes over Izuku, thin and malicious. He can't help but lose his patience, the soft pout sliding off his face like oil on water.

**_Kacchan. Look at me. I said something to you. Turn your head._ **

That head keeps its steady state, still watching this silly little show. As if it matters. More than Izuku himself, that is.

Why won't he acknowledge Izuku? Maybe he didn't hear him? Was that just a reflexive _ 'shut up'? _

**_That's not it. Why won't you look at me?!_ **

Izuku's heart is captivated by how cool Kacchan looks, but he is also resentful of how _ cool _ Kacchan is _ for him. _Does he think that just because he is better, he doesn't belong to Izuku?

**_As if. I'm your sole owner, Kacchan. _**

**_And if I tell you to _****_look, _****_you are going to _****_look._ **

**_Come on. It's easy. Gently tilt your head, tense your neck muscles, change the coordinates of your pupils and switch your head by forty-five degrees. Not too hard, is it?_ **

**_I'm demanding your attention. _****_Look at me-_ **

He is about to nudge his friend by the shoulder, when he rethinks his actions.

_ 'It's too early yet for Kacchan to be aware of my feelings.' _ Taking his hand back, _ 'I can't do it right now. This is an important moment for both of us. Kacchan was right! I should shut up.' _

"...Okay, Kacchan," Izuku says.

The other boy though, in fact, was beating himself up.

_ 'You're a _**_smooth _**_ little fucker, aren't you, Katsuki?' _ he worries. _ 'This was your chance to comfort your crush, and then you slipped back into habit and silenced that high-pitched, adorable voice.' _

Katsuki forces himself to stare at the puny robot and the ear-ripper shouting there, lest he throw himself into Deku's arms to nuzzle his chest. And that chest looks **_so _**huggable. Katsuki doesn't know what Deku did all these months to upgrade his muscles, but it's paying off well.

Like, Izuku had _ always _ been cute. He was the smallest of their year, smaller than even some of the girls. He had a lean, petite frame; always perfect for swooping in his strong arms to cuddle whenever he pleased. Like a precious doll just for him.

_ (Not that he ever did-) _

But - well. He had apparently _ grown. _

Now, Deku looks compact as if a heap of muscles had been shoved into his body instantaneously. But _ damn _ because _ thank God for those muscles. _ Or else Katsuki would have never known the beauty of two bouncy ass cheeks attached to those wide, gorgeous hips; swaying with each step forward. He never would have _ truly _ understood the meanings of _ 'Crush my head between your thighs,' _ and _ 'I'd let him step on me,' _and various sentences dedicated to thirst.

So if Katsuki _ glances _ at Deku, even for a nanosecond, he'll be _ all over the fucking nerd. _

_ 'You must not look Katsuki - You must not look Katsuki - You must not-' _

But then, a horrible thought sneaks into his mind.

_ 'What if a robot crushes him?' _ he wonders hysterically. _ 'There'll be a lot. What if they punch him through a wall? What if they shove him off somewhere high? What if - What If Izuku _**_dies?'_ **

Katsuki's eyes dart around in search for something to aid him. What to do, what to do?! This is a matter of life and death!

**_You can't die, Deku. I refuse. You aren't allowed to. You are gonna be at my side for the rest of your life. I'm gonna keep watch every hour of every day if it's the last thing I do!_ **

Katsuki's time is ticking with every flick of his tiny movements. Each second wasted is a failure to fulfill the responsibility of his love! Why can't he do what he needs to do?! _ Fuck, _ he needs to **_think!_ **

And as he catches sight of the teenagers muttering lowly among themselves, a thought pops into his mind.

What he needs is not a hack but…

_ …a _**_partner in crime._ **

* * *

When the lecture is over, Katsuki is scrambling over the place for someone who is in Deku's area.

He had been stupid when he panicked, he knows that. The truth is, anything relating to Izuku causes him to _ lose his head completely, _with no rationality remaining. He will have to thank him for that when they marry - that might make for an interesting story.

But the further truth he had realized is, _ Katsuki's uselessness in this instance. _

And what do you do if you find yourself lacking the ability to do something?

_ You recruit _**_someone _**_ to do it for you. _

"You-" He manhandles a random guy by his shirt. "Are you on Area A?!"

The guy turns around and - oh God that was a hideous face. Ew. Long, curling, _ sparkling _ hair and a very _ punchable _ smug smile.

"Hm," he says, gaze boring into Katsuki as if he knows all of his secrets. Katsuki shivers in response. "Yes, was there a reason for your question, _ monsieur?" _

Well, fuck. Katsuki ended up grabbing a nut job. Better leave now to find someone else quickly.

He is about to run away when the guy has him caught by the wrist.

"Not so fast, _ mon ami! Dieu, _I have no idea why you are asking, but you must not leave me in the dark!"

Ugh. Someone save him.

_ 'Though,' _ he considers. _ 'I don't have much time left. I should use this while I still have a chance.' _

"You saw that green guy, right?" Katsuki demands. Leaning into his to-be-underling, "I want you to steal any robot he finds."

The other blond raises a perfectly tailored eyebrow, "And what do _I_ get out of it?"

Katsuki appraises him. He doesn't seem like he has any use for money, and there's nothing else Katsuki can give him to satisfy him.

Well. _ Fuck- _ton of good that does.

"An act of service," Katsuki proposes at last. "A favor for a favor."

The guy's eyes begin twinkling like stars at his offer, clasping his hands together.

"Oh, _ marvelous! _ What a cunning and underhanded deal we have made in the epitome of nobility! Dear _ monsieur-" _ He sets his unnerving stare into Katsuki's eyes, directly. "- _ D'accord! _I accept!"

"Good," Katsuki licks his lips, impatient to leave at once. "Okay. That's a deal. You get Deku's points and I get - well. Bye now."

He turns tail and abandons the hall.

_ There. _ Fucking _ there. _Katsuki had been triumphant. He had conquered this enemy posing a threat. A threat to his cherished little love.

**You can't run from me, Deku. You'll be safer than anyone in this world. All for me. You'll be the reward for my ascension. Just you wait. **

* * *

Yuga is someone who _ loves _games.

And this is no different. Just with a different set of rules.

_ 'But,' _ he surmises. _ 'I will need something to throw the suspicion off my back. Maybe-' _ He notices the tall, strict boy from the lecture. _ 'Hm. Why not.' _

He searches for the one with green hair, spotting him easily with the muttering. When the boy starts walking up to a girl, Yuga has a _ wonderful _ plan.

"_ Excuse moi," _he calls to the tall boy. "I believe this person is trying to distract a fellow competitor! What if this causes her to fail?"

He points at the one he's sabotaging, making sure to form his face into the personification of innocence.

When he hears the outraged gasp, he knows that the plan worked.

And in no time at all, everyone is against the green boy; no doubt willing to steal his points with no shame.

_ 'Hon hon hon I'm so devilish.' _

* * *

Izuku is scared. He's so scared. He wants to escape this nightmarish exam! A _ robot? _ That's just too much! If this continues, he will - _ he will-! _

_ Then he sees her. _

The girl from earlier, battered, weakened by the debris around and on her. She can't run from the overwhelming danger. She will die.

_ 'Kacchan,' _Izuku remembers, not knowing why. And he runs. He runs.

When he comes to, he's on the ground. His legs are scorching, as if someone is stabbing them with countless needles.

* * *

Katsuki is running.

In hindsight, he should have known his plan was too perfect to be true. Finding someone to do his bidding _ that easily? _ Don't make him laugh. This was a cruel lesson from the universe for him to know his place. _ Beneath _ fate.

Because if Deku is to become a Hero, he needs to _ break _himself first.

But Katsuki doesn't want him to. For once in his life, he _ wishes _Izuku wouldn't run so wholeheartedly at danger. Doesn't he know what he's doing to Katsuki's soul?!

**_I gripe so much about you being safe but…_ **

**_The simple truth is, _****_Izuku_ ****_, I just can't live without you._ **

**_What must I do for you to acknowledge that?_ **

**_Should I just confess? Will that make you stop?_ **

**_I doubt that. That _****_thing_ ****_ is too deeply embedded in you._ **

**_The spirit of a Hero._ **

"Hey, excuse me!" he shouts as he runs up to that banana-hair Hero from the lecture. "I heard that - I heard from another competitor that my friend got injured!"

"Gah, kid, slow down and breathe a bit!"

Katsuki doubles over as the lactic acid finally shows its effect in his appendages, rendering them immobile. Panting, he forces himself to ask, "I need to - I need to see _ D-Deku! _To m-make sure he's okay!"

"Wha- alright. Repeat that. _ Who?" _

"Deku. Izuku. Midoriya."

The Hero stares at him for a second longer before he puts his hand on his shoulder, an apologetic expression taking hold.

"Sorry but… It's against procedure to let students out of UA into the infirmary with no injuries," he says. "Can I do something else for ya?"

Katsuki shakes his head, despair ringing through his chest, rattling his ribcage with the force.

"I just," he starts, wary. "He's _ Quirkless, _ my friend. I'm… _ worried. _What if he's too injured to live normally?"

"_ Oh," _the man intones, a weird glint in his eyes. "I guess I could… Well. Maybe we can make an exception. I'll go talk to the Principal. Rest assured, kid! Recovery Girl's Quirk is unparalleled."

Katsuki nearly sobs from the relief overtaking him. He doesn't but the leftover tears in his eyes _ glint _, he's sure of it. He nods shallowly, moving out of the Hero's way to let him go his way.

**_I wish you knew how much I'd do for you, Deku._ **

**_I wish you knew your hold on me._ **

**_Because you might not be mine but…_ **

**_I'm already yours._ **

* * *

"Oof," Izuku says as Recovery Girl prods him. "Is it over yet?"

"Patience, young man," she rebuffs, poking with a needle especially hard. Another _ 'ouch' _reverberates in the room. "You wrecked yourself quite a bit. I need to make sure everything's good and dandy!"

A knock sounds and Present Mic enters the infirmary, grinning sheepishly at Recovery Girl's look of contempt.

"Hey, kiddo," he greets, probably meaning Izuku. Making a thumbs-up, "Good to see ya alive and kickin'! You worried your friend a good bit!"

"My… friend?" Izuku wondered aloud, confused as to who that was. "Who…?"

"Huh, that's kinda cold," Present Mic says as he shrugs. "Here, you can come in, kid!"

But then he opens the door for…

_ Kacchan?! _

"Kacchan!" Izuku exclaims in delight, face lighting up as if he had seen the gardens of heaven. "You're - You're _ here, _you waited for me!"

"Sup," Kacchan answers merely, hands in pockets and shuffling his feet. "Heard you were blown apart from some random guy."

"Ah…"

"I told you not to fucking dive into danger."

"I - I know…"

"Well. You're alright. Aren't you?"

"I guess so?"

"I'm going now."

Izuku's face drops at that. He had been excited about Kacchan staying for him, but…

What if he was just doing it as formality? Like, what if Auntie Mitsuki was worried and asked Kacchan to check for her?

"Oh," Izuku says, lowering his head. "...Alright, Kacchan."

Kacchan nods, turning on his heels to get out the door.

"Kacchan!" Izuku calls as a last moment plea. His hand reaches, hesitant as if everything would fall apart with his touch. "I… I'm your _ friend _… Right?"

He gets a glimpse of red eyes before the door's shut in his face.

_'Oh,' _Izuku intones inwardly, slightly aware of his environment. There's an ache in his throat, a buzzing in his eyes. _'I think I'm crying.'_

* * *

_ 'Stupid, stupid, _**_stupid.'_ **

How could he have left that _ Deku _ with impression that Katsuki wants to be _ friends? _

_ Friends _ are for weak-ass pussies who are too cowardly to reveal their feelings. Those pushovers get stuck in the **_Friendzone._ **

Katsuki doesn't reveal **_his _** feelings because he has to secure Deku first. What's the point if Deku is gonna die before Katsuki can even say _ 'I love-'? _ Exactly.

But… maybe the time has come.

...Later. Katsuki is - uh - he's _ busy. _ Yup. Too busy to call Deku and say _ 'Hey little fucker I like your lips a lot can we go on a date?' _

For now, he needs to recharge from his Deku-Induced Aneurysm. Yes, he should do that.

With that last thought, he walks down the hall to find the exit.

**_I just want you to…_ **

* * *

**_...be..._ **

* * *

**_...mine._ **

* * *

**_Kacchan._ **

**_You broke my heart._ **


	5. uwu so cute

Izuku runs out of the school as soon as his injuries heal fully. There are dried tear tracks painting his cheeks and red-rimmed eyes glaring at anyone brave enough to stare.

**_Stupid Kacchan. You've been making me sad a lot. What to do?_ **

He passes through the traffic lights across the street in a mad dash.

**_What to do?_ **

Izuku stops at last, breath heavy after his spontaneous sprint. He sees he's ended up right at the subway station.

**_What to do?_ **

_ 'I need him to acknowledge me for once,' _ Izuku decides while moving to buy a ticket. _ 'Even if - Even if I have to-' _ He gulps. _'Even if I gotta force him to. He's had his chance. I gave him plenty, after all! Kacchan is just too dense to figure out he needs me. I have to… I have to confront him. Maybe if I show him I won't go along with him all the time, he'll realize I'm not some dumb underling!' _

**_If you won't accept me, Kacchan, I'll have to make you. You're mine, after all. This is the life you need to get used to._ **

With a nod at his own conclusion, he steps through the subway's door.

**_I'll make you understand. Soon enough. 'Not my friend?' Hah. As if, you're so funny. We're inseparable. You'll see it, too._ **

* * *

Katsuki is making his own plan, in the bowels of his home.

Getting out of the Friend Zone seems much harder than he thought.

_ 'All Google says is to let your crush know your feelings and hope for the fucking best. Pah! Do those morons think I'll leave the most important moment of my life to _**_chance?'_ **

Izuku would overthink it all if Katsuki confessed. _ 'Oh, but how long has Kacchan been in love with me?' 'Why me of everyone?' 'I - I should have seen it! How could I not notice it?!' _

Or the worst case scenario.

_ 'Ew! Kacchan's into _**_guys? _**_ I never would have expected that of him!' _

Seriously, it's giving Katsuki the shivers. Sure, it's not a big deal to most, but _ what if? _

He huddles closer to the Deku-plush he had commissioned years before, scooping up ice cream to stuff his face with under his blankets.

"Katsuki!" his mother yells from upstairs. "Stop hiding in the basement! It's dinnertime and I know you stole my fucking ice cream! Get back up!"

"FUCK YOU, OLD HAG!" Katsuki answers with the same _ polite _tone. "It's my turn to mope!"

"Um - _ no. _You little shit." Katsuki hears footsteps approaching the locked door, just before a series of knocks nearly break the hard wood. "Is this about Izuku-chan again? I told you that he'd notice the cameras! Now he knows you're a shitty creep, doesn't he?"

"He does _ not," _ Katsuki repels as he navigates the various hidden cameras he had sneaked into his beloved's room. Through a rather nifty remote. "Because he doesn't _ know!" _

"THEN WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON, YOU SON OF A BITCH?!"

Katsuki screams into the Twisting Nether in sheer, encompassing frustration. The harpy upstairs' eardrums must be bleeding.

"Fine," Mitsuki sighs. Like, _ wow, _Katsuki can hear that sigh from behind a ten-inch-thick door. "Guess you'll have the rest of the moping hours to yourself, hungry for proper protein. And I guess I can throw away those totally illegal Izuku body pillows-"

Katsuki has scaled the fifteen-step ladder without breaking a sweat and unlocked the door before she's finished her words.

"I'm fucking here now," he announces uselessly. He doesn't look at her face because he _ knows _there's a smug smile there.

Mitsuki grins, "Good. Tell me what's got you angry, you little brat."

"Huh? Nothing. Don't put your huge nose in my business."

"It's my business, too," she interjects, ruffling his hair and - ugh. Please don't let her smile like Katsuki is wearing her makeup again. "You're my baby, after all! Have you two kissed yet?"

Katsuki's whole face bursts into flames at the very suggestion. It throws him back into the memory of that almost-kiss…

Izuku's soft lips…

His shifty, _ embarrassed _eyes…

Those cheeks that just _ wouldn't _stop twitching…

"F - Fuck no," Katsuki retorts with a pause in between. He's caught between being humiliated and feeling dreamy. "I haven't told him yet."

"Then _ tell him." _

"It's not that easy!" he complains as they begin to walk towards the kitchen. "How the hell could I do it anyway?!"

"Well," she drawls. "I don't fucking know. You're his friend. You can ask him to hang out and he wouldn't bat an eyelash because you're fucking friends. It's awesome for going on dates without him _ knowing they are dates." _

Katsuki is… actually intrigued. No. He isn't really. He's just… mildly interested in how he can use this. "And?"

"Psh, do you need me to do everything for you?"

"FORGET I FUCKING ASKED THEN!"

"PFT - HAHA; SHUT UP, YOU BRAT!" Mitsuki shouts back as she enters the kitchen giggling, taking her seat alongside Katsuki. Thanking her husband absentmindedly when he hands her the chopsticks, she looks back to her son. "I guess you could try wooing him like this. Imagine if you showed up as a suitor! He would be a mess of nerves! With him ignorant, you can get him comfortable with you."

"You know a lot about this for someone who supposedly seduced Dad with a flick of her wrist," Katsuki mutters, suspicious as he fills his mouth with the tuna.

"Ah," Masaru exhales wistfully, eyes far away. "I remember the first time I met your mother. She was so blunt, so stubborn, so hard to resist… In the end, I got stuck in her web!"

With a flash of inspiration, Katsuki says, "You mean you just couldn't say no to her?"

* * *

Ladies and motherfuckers; Katsuki has a bomb-ass plan.

* * *

Izuku starts visiting dear Kacchan every night.

He knows that frequency breeds recklessness, so he's always careful to cover his tracks with manic meticulousness. Each fingerprint is left with thought-out consideration and each noise made is as silent as possible.

But most importantly, each memento from his visitations is something to not be missed.

An old pencil sharpener. A greyed, unused poster of All Might. _ Oh, _Izuku might have picked up a pair of boxers or such, but they're in good hands! And everything Kacchan owns will be Izuku's as well, when they marry; so it's alright, right?

Right?

Izuku nods to himself.

_ Right. _

**_It's nice to have a piece of Kacchan to greet when I return home. It's good to remember I can get even more if I want to. It makes me feel so free and happy! _**

**_If I had the chance, I would have sneaked a tuft of Kacchan's hair. But this is okay, too. I can touch his hair all I want when we start dating._ **

**_Soon enough._ **

* * *

Izuku is startled when instead of him walking up to Kacchan to ask for a private talk, he's approached by _ Kacchan himself. _

"Oi, Deku," Kacchan says as a greeting (Is it a greeting?) and pulls him by the collar of his uniform. Izuku yelps, getting a darling view of his Kacchan's beautiful face.

_ 'He's so close,' _ Izuku panics, nearly hyperventilating from the butterflies in his stomach. _ 'Too close! Close enough to k - k - kiss…!' _

"We're jogging in the park for tomorrow morning's run," Kacchan says, as if oblivious to Izuku's growing quiver. Those eyes, _ oh, _those eyes are so pretty. So red. Izuku wishes to pluck them out for preserving. "Get up at five, I'll give you fifteen minutes to prepare and we'll head out."

"O - Oh," Izuku intones, swallowing his saliva with surprising difficulty. "Why though?"

_ I DID NOT JUST SAY THAT! _**_ Why, _**_ why does it matter?! Kacchan wants to spend some time _**_together_ **_ and I ask _**_why?!_ **

Kacchan, ever the cooler of them, raises one eyebrow and says, "'Cause I said so. So you wanna be friends? We'll be friends. What more does your shitty ass want, Deku?"

**_With you in my arms, my notebooks in my bag and a package of gummy bears we share; watching Hero fights and cuddling._ **

"Uh-" Izuku smiles, hesitant. "This is enough! Thank you so much, Kacchan!"

The object of his affections rolls his eyes, turning back to leave.

Izuku stands stoic like a statue.

It… This hasn't gone according to the plan.

He hadn't expected this! He had had a whole plan and everything about how he would ensnare Kacchan in his love. Not to mention the whole _ k-kidnapping _thing he had been moving towards!

But… this is okay. This is what Izuku has been hoping for, isn't it? Kacchan said he wanted to be…

_ ...friends. _

Oh. Izuku is suddenly not that happy anymore.

_ 'Why?' _ he asks himself, perplexed by the complexity of his feelings. _ 'I _**_want _**_ to be Kacchan's friend. Maybe I just don't want _**_him_ **_ to want that as well? Am I… Am I a masochist…?! Is that it? No… It's not that…' _

**_No. This just isn't right. Why would you want to be my friend, Kacchan? So soon after rejecting me? What the hell do you want?!_ **

**_I mean… I do want him to be my best friend. But I also want him to be my boyfriend. Best boyfriends? Eh, that sounds weird. Whatever._ **

**_Ah, Kacchan… I really love you, you know? I love every part of you, but I just wish you could make up your mind._ **

* * *

Class: In session.

Target: Kacchan, of course.

Mission: Watch even more of Kacchan as he makes subtle micro-expressions.

Izuku can see a bit of him without craning his neck - just the edges of his eyes and his ear, and that mess of spiky hair. But if Hamada from the nearby desk leans in to squint at the board again, he can get a whole faceful view of his childhood sweetheart.

**_I hope you haven't noticed all those trinkets you keep "losing." Keep going like this. I hope you can forgive me, in the future. It was all because I missed you a lot! Surely it's not a big deal?_ **

**_My collection has been growing bigger and bigger, thanks to you spacing out all the time. _**

Something about it rubs him the wrong way though. Kacchan's eyes had never been so clouded before, nor had they ever been so half-lidded. As if - _ As if- _

_ 'What are you thinking of that is so engrossing to you? Are you thinking of me?' _

**_Or are you thinking of something else?_ **

Izuku clenches his hands, nails leaving crescent bruises in his palms.

**_I forbid it, Kacchan. You know you can't think of anything other than me and our dream. You don't have that kind of luxury. _**

**_Or perhaps is it-_ **

He snaps and the pencil between his fingers _ crunches. _

"Midoriya?!" The teacher exclaims in concern, head swerving around to stare at him like the rest of the class, incredulous. "Is there… Is there a problem? If I may ask?"

Izuku starts to breathe in a pattern when he realizes his control had nearly broken.

**_Eight in - hold seven. Five out. Eight in, hold seven, five out. Eight in, hold seven-_ **

He smiles softly, eyes hooded.

"Everything's alright," he pushes, his voice saccharine like the nitroglycerin of his beloved's skin. "I apologize for causing a disruption, Sensei."

The man's forehead shines from the perspiration, jaw tense. "If… If you say so, Midoriya. Try and pay attention next time, please."

Everyone is taut like a stretched string, yet Kacchan is still buried in his daydreaming.

**_Kacchan._ **

**_Do you have a crush on someone?_ **

**_Tell me who and I'll forgive you. Many human emotions are fickle, after all. I'll be sure to make you love ME at the end of this._ **

**_The recipient, however-_ **

**_I will not be so lenient on them. Sorry about that. You should have held back your feelings if you didn't want them to die! It's your fault that I'm jealous._ **

**_Or maybe… you wanted me to feel like this? Why? Are you punishing me? Is it because I want to be your best friend? _**

**_Please don't be like this. I just want to monopolize you all to myself. Is that so bad?_ **

**_Is that so bad?_ **

* * *

_ There's a reason that Midoriya's teacher had been so frightened by a seemingly childish act of emotion. _

_ It has roots back to his primary school days. _

_ Maybe an example will make it easier to understand. _

* * *

_ Izuku knows that Kacchan is popular. He had always known that. _

_ He just hadn't realized the other connotations of the statement. _

_ "Katsuki-kun," Hanako-chan from the upper-grade coos. Izuku's trembling in rage all over his body. "Your Quirk is so powerful! Are you gonna be a Hero?" _

_ Kacchan ( _**_Kacchan! Why is he smiling? Stop it!_ **_ ) smiles, smug. "Of course I am! It's so _**_this_ **_ Deku-" He points at Izuku, startling the boy from his thoughts. "- doesn't go and get himself killed! He's so useless by himself, so I'm gonna handle the Villains for him." _

_ "Like… protecting Deku?" Hanako-chan ( _**_For some reason, he doesn't want to call her 'chan' anymore._ **_ ) makes a sour face. "That sounds weird, Katsuki-kun! No one would be a Hero just for that reason. Come on, why do you wanna be a Hero, _**_really_ **_ ?" _

_ Kacchan has a strange expression. Izuku doesn't like it that Hanako went and put him in this mood. He clutches the scissors in his hand tight. _

_ "Is it," Kacchan starts, voice a bit subdued. "Is it really _**_that _**_ weird?" _

_ "Huh? Of course it is! It makes it sound like you _**_like _**_ him, Katsuki-kun!" _

_ "I - I don't!" Kacchan exclaims hurriedly. A jolt of pain spears through Izuku's ribs and his heart ceases in his chest, breaths tremulous. "He's useless, of course I don't like him! It's just that - uh - I wanna beat up all the Villains!" _

**_Shut up. Stop making him say these. What do you think you're doing, Hanako? Do you think Kacchan's gonna like you just because you're saying mean things to me?_ **

**_Stop it._ **

**_Stop talking._ **

**_Or I'll - Or I'll…!_ **

_ "Huh? Deku?" Hanako asks, turning to him. "What's wrong? Are you gonna cry? Katsuki-kun hates you, you know!" _

**_SHUT UP._ **

_ "SHUT UP!" he screams, lunging at her with scissors ready and sharp. She squeaks in fright and stumbles back, giving Izuku the chance to _**_stab where it matters-_ **

_ He's caught by his wrists. _

_ "What are you doing, Deku?" Kacchan demands, jostling him. Shoving Izuku away from _**_that girl_ **_ , he looms over the shaken boy. "Were you gonna hurt her?" _

_ "I - I," Izuku stammers, eyes wide in fear. "I just-" _

_ "Yeah, you were gonna get suspended just now!" Kacchan grabs the scissors from his hands, tucking it in his pocket. "If you go and do bad things to people, they lock you up! Didn't you know that, idiot Deku? Figures I'd be the Hero rather than you, if you don't know even _**_this._ **_ Were you gonna-" _

_ Kacchan freezes in his spot, stare glassy and cold. He looks back at Izuku's prone figure, lips pulling back to a snarl, " _**_Were you trying to ditch me, Deku?_ **_ " _

_ "Of - Of course not, Kacchan!" Izuku denies, outraged despite his predicament. Try and _**_leave _**_ Kacchan? Izuku is _**_in love _**_ with him. It just isn't possible with his feelings. _

_ Kacchan examines what he can, apparently deciding Izuku's telling the truth. _

_ "What - What went on there?!" the teacher arrives. His eyes have that look that indicates he is fishing for someone to blame. "Midoriya, what was that?" _

_ "It was nothing, Sensei," Kacchan placates the man, putting on one of his bright faces. "Hanako insulted Deku and then he was angry, but I handled it!" _

_ "Oh, is that -" He glances back at Izuku, gulping at his irritated stare. "- is that right?" _

_ "Yeah," Izuku mutters, a pout on his pursed lips. _

* * *

_ It's not much, but it's enough to rattle an ordinary school teacher. _

* * *

"Kacchan likes running a lot," remarks Izuku, even as each step adds to his heavy burden with the aching muscles. "We've never come across each other, though!"

Izuku loves the fresh fragrance of the morning. The air is so clean and the sky so gentle, he simply can't control his excitement! _ Ah _ , but the best part is **_Kacchan_ **.

_ Kacchan in his tight tank top, clinging to his sweaty pectorals. Kacchan's thighs forcing the cloth of his tights. Kacchan's avid gaze as he stares at the path. Kacchan messed-up hair. Kacchan's parted lips, Kacchan's tongue darting out to wet them._

_ And Izuku's favorite: Kacchan's enchanting red eyes. _

Oh, Izuku so _ loves _watching Kacchan. It's much nicer to be able to do it in close quarters.

"That's because you're a lazy Deku," Kacchan replies with his trademark pissed-off expression_. _ "I usually get out earlier and return before five. I slept in today. See how much running I'm sacrificing to accommodate your needs ?"

Izuku snorts, a huff of laughter escaping from the corners of his lips, "Kacchan_, _ you couldn't possibly know my schedule. I _ could _ be waking up at four."

Such a strange, interesting idea. _ Kacchan, _keeping watch of Izuku just like Izuku does Kacchan himself? In which universe is his crush wholly reciprocated?

_ 'There's no chance,' _ Izuku thinks because he _ knows. 'I know everything about Kacchan, after all. He has no equipment to support those camera systems at all. I checked. None of the rooms have anything to hide.' _

Kacchan's expression slides into something unrecognizable, even by Izuku's standards. He wonders what the boy's thinking about, face slack and mouth pulled in tension.

"Let's take a short break," Kacchan says at last. Izuku loves how considerate he is! From those muscles, it looks like Kacchan runs a lot. He must be holding back so Izuku could keep up…

**_Ah, Kacchan… I fall in love with you more with each breath you take, with each word you say, with each second you exist. How can you be so perfect? I'll never catch up to you in this case._ **

"Okay, Kacchan," Izuku says, sighing with a tinge of longing.

They slow down gradually and stop by a nearby bench. With the opportunity, Izuku takes a bit of time to study the park they're in.

The sun hasn't risen yet, but the songbirds have already started their morning symphony. The pale blue of the woozy sky blushes in the east, veiled by an overlay of fog. He inhales the clean air, saturated by the smells of grass and petrichor.

Turning to Kacchan who is gulping down a whole bottle of water, Izuku contemplated asking what's been in his mind.

**_Do you have a girlfriend, Kacchan? A boyfriend? Any significant other?_ **

**_Nope. You're too busy with training. I wonder if you would accept me if I revealed my inner desires…_ **

**_Soon, I hope. I'm not going to be patient for much longer, waiting for you to grow up and mature. Time's ticking._ **

**_I'm going to be your best friend and the one you love with all your being, Kacchan. There's no escape from that. You can deny me all you want but we both know that your tantrum's futile._ **

Oh, but what interests Izuku more is something of a… sensitive nature.

**_Or maybe you have a CRUSH, Kacchan?_ **

**_Is that it?_ **

**_Are you two-timing me? Is that why you don't wanna be my friend anymore? Huh? You fucking bitch. I'll show you what it means to cheat on me-_ **

"The fuck are you lookin' at, Deku?" Kacchan asks him, startling Izuku out of his manic thoughts with his glare. "Your eyes went freaky. What the hell are you thinking about?"

"Why did you say you don't wanna be my friend anymore?" Izuku asks him. It visibly startles the other, probably because of the lack of _ 'Kacchan,' _and the rude tone.

Kacchan ceases slouching, straightening into his full height - which is pretty tall. Probably a whole _ head _taller than Izuku, who is rather short for his age. Maybe Kacchan drank lots of milk? Izuku vaguely remembers some memories of it.

_ Later _. Kacchan has answers to give.

**_Why did you make me join your morning jog, Kacchan? As you said, you usually do it on your own terms. Why were you kind to me? Why did you change your mind about us?_ **

"I mean," Izuku mumbles as Kacchan keeps his silence. He could feel the sweat breaking out in his hands, heating up his neck uncomfortably. "You probably thought you could do better, and - well, you obviously can. But I wasn't talking about that actually. We were close our whole lives; then, out of the blue, you decided we weren't friends anymore."

Izuku swallows in his dry mouth. Kacchan's eyes send him into a delirium of opia, each cell of his body breached by the gaze set on him. He hasn't revealed his secret yet, but it feels as if Kacchan can already see it within his depraved soul.

"Deku," Kacchan says, advancing on him. Izuku backs away, hitting the bench with the backs of his knees. Hands settle at his sides on the metal bars, trapping him in Kacchan's hold. "We aren't friends."

"I - I know," Izuku whimpers, a sudden sob fighting to push out of his throat. He is stopped by Kacchan's palm settling on his cheek.

"We aren't friends," Kacchan repeats, in the same tone one might say that two plus two is four. "It makes you sad because you don't know what I mean by that."

Izuku sniffs. "And," he dares to ask. "And what do you m - mean by that?"

Their gazes are interlocked, woven into each other. If Izuku wasn't holding in his tearful gawking, he would have been mesmerized by the deep focus in his love's luminous irises.

Kacchan smirks, sharp teeth showing through the slit. "We aren't friends. Friends aren't like us, Deku. We are more than that. Hell, we are even better than _ best friends, _ aren't we? Why would you want a fucking downgrade when we can be _ us?" _

Izuku realizes with a rush in his ears, deafening him, that Kacchan hadn't been renouncing their bond. The drops well up, making his eyes glisten in happiness and relief.

Kacchan had been pulling them _ closer. _

"Ka - _ Kaaaacchaaaaan," _ he cries, burrowing his head between his best friend's bulging pectorals. " _ Kaaaccchaaaaaan…!" _

"Tch, stop crying, you idiot. It's just like _ you _to get so worked up by unimportant things."

Izuku feels Kacchan put his chin on top of his head, so gently. He's so close to him that it's unbelievable with their history of conflict. So he takes advantage of this moment fully, breathing in the sweet scent of nitroglycerin and the savory musk of exercise. Mouth open, he inhales the mixture of delight that makes up the fragrance he recognizes as _ Kacchan. _ And there's an emotion surging through the alignment of his spine, curving around his innards and washing them with a fresh rain of - _ oh. _

It's contentment. It's serenity. It's comfort. It's _ elation. _

It's **_love._ **

"I've been thinking a bit," Kachan mumbles above him. "Sure, nothing can top this, but I've decided also being friends wouldn't be so terrible. How 'bout going to a café after our first day at UA?"

Izuku lets out a damp laugh, smiling against Kacchan's clothing, arms encircled around the waist. "I would never say no to you, Kacchan."


	6. izuku wanna lick the eye (no bby u cant)

_Katsuki had never seen something so beautiful. _

* * *

**_The day it all began._ **

* * *

_Katsuki, from the moment he had stepped into the room of children, had been revolted. _

_Looking at the hordes of creatures, crawling about as they pleased, awakened a violent urge within the depths of his being. These insolent little _**_things, _**_daring to try to upstage _**_him_ **_? Katsuki? Were they joking? Merely a kindergartener, he had already known the truth of the world. _

**_Katsuki was the best. There was simply no question about it. No one could do the things he could. _**

**_No one._ **

_Perhaps that was why it had been so lonely. _

* * *

_Katsuki hadn't always been in love with Deku, but he was glad from the moment he started to. _

* * *

_Izuku, in Katsuki's memories, was a tiny blob of greenery. _

_At least, at first. _

_He took shape as their relationship progressed. Katsuki allowed him to linger around, unknowing of the reason. Because there just _**_wasn't _**_one - he had thought the boy was amusing, with his attempts to impress him. _

_(He never could. The only one who could impress Katsuki was _**_himself_ **_.) _

_After a while, something had... _**_changed._ **

_Katsuki isn't sure what. However, he can pinpoint a moment back in those days; the moment he had decided he was in love with Midoriya Izuku. _

* * *

_"Kacchan," Izuku whined from atop the grassy hill. "There aren't flowers anywhere!" _

_"Go look more," Katsuki shouted at him. Really, who did that brat think he was? "I bet your eyes are going blind!" _

_Izuku's horrified gasp was satisfying. It wasn't enough to satiate, but good enough to keep his anger leashed. With a wicked grin on his lips, Katsuki climbed the dry soil leading to the field where Izuku stood. _

_The idiot broccoli pouted, face sour. "Kacchan, you shouldn't make mean jokes." _

_Katsuki just shrugged. Who was Izuku to judge him? Katsuki could do _**_anything_ **_. He wasn't restricted by boundaries. _

_"Oh," Izuku exclaimed, head snapping left to see a patch of wild carnations. "Kacchan! Kacchan, do you see them? They're so pretty!" _

_There was a small area of foliage, lined with rows of pinks, purples, and reds. The petals looked soft and delicate, but the edges were tattered. Their design gave them the appearance of a tarnished Queen, bloodied after a long battle of endurance. The green stalks keeping the blooms upright swayed in the breeze, greeting the blue sky above. _

_"Yeah," Katsuki said, blindsided. "They're kind of nice, I guess." _

_Izuku scrambled to reach them. "I'll get a few for you, Kacchan!" _

_"Wait - stupid! It's too muddy to go there!" _

_"Ah, but - but it's for _**_Kacchan_ **_," the boy said, eyes meeting Katsuki's. _

_For a moment, it felt as if his lungs had _**_collapsed_ **_. Katsuki couldn't _**_breathe_ **_\- _

_"If it's for Kacchan," Izuku, that moron, continued. His green eyes still sucked the air out of him. "I'll do it. Only for Kacchan." _

_Katsuki let him go to the flowers. _

**_Ba-thump._ **

**_Ba-thump._ **

_What's this? _

**_Ba-thump._ **

_Katsuki was becoming weird inside. His stomach twisted itself around, his wind-pipe was clogged to the brim. The fleshy pink of his tongue peeked from between his lips, mouth dry. _

_Izuku picked the red carnations. _

**_Hey, Izuku._ **

_Soft smile, gentle demeanor, precious fingers. Those fingers that danced upon the leaves. _

**_You look-_ **

_Katsuki's expression _**_trembled_ **_. _

_"Kacchan-" Izuku turned around, displaying his surprise and a beaming smile fixed on his face. "- this is yours!" _

_Izuku walked up to him with a crown of wildflowers in his hands, like a prince striding through the aisle to the altar of his bride. _

_Then it was in Katsuki's arms. The leaves were twined together intricately; a weaving of fragile stems and little budding petals, paired with the ripe blooms of red. _

_"It reminded me of Kacchan," Izuku murmured. He must be shy. "They looked so much like your eyes, I just couldn't leave them there!" _

_Katsuki doesn't speak, he doesn't _**_breathe_ **_. _

_Without a word, he places it upon Izuku's mess of dark green hair. Gingerly, he pats down the fluffed parts. _

_"It's yours now," Katsuki said, because _**_what else can he say at the face of something like this-_ **

_Izuku grins; teeth uneven, freckles dotting along his cheeks, eyes closed in bliss… _

**_You look-_ **

**_\- beautiful._ **

* * *

Izuku averts his eyes as he walks up to his desk.

The sound of tittering makes him flush, folding more and more into himself. He sits down with the hurry of a scrambling kindergartener.

From then on, he feels better. Kacchan sits right in front of him, if Izuku hadn't known better he would have said that the boy was smiling at him.

"You're stalking me even now, huh," Kacchan muses, malicious. Izuku is sure that he knows he can hear him. "What, do you have a new notebook as well?"

"Ah-" His hands hover in the air uselessly, shaking in fear and excitement. "I - I don't?"

"Speak the fuck up. I can't hear you."

"I don't, Kacchan," Izuku obeys. "But I still remember everything I wrote, so it's okay! Though, it would have been good to have that one you burnt."

Kacchan clicks his tongue, facing the front of the classroom again. Then, as if it had just occurred to him, he turns back around.

He stares at Izuku, eyes almost comical in their suspicion. It's really cute. He wants to dissect them and cut out the irises, just for himself.

**_Mine, Kacchan. Even your eyes are mine. Look at how they glisten with ocular fluids. I wish I could lick them off! Would they taste sweet like your scent? I wonder…_ **

"Deku," Kacchan drawls, snapping Izuku out of his reverie. "What do you mean you remember _everything _?"

"Oh," Izuku smiles at him, adoring his demanding nature. "Exactly what I said. I know everything about Kacchan!"

"...Huh?"

" **For example, I know that Kacchan likes going to bed at precisely eight - thirty - five each night,** " he says with a wide, enthusiastic grin. " **Kacchan likes Mitsuki-san's cinnamon shampoo, and he also likes waking up at night to get a glass of cold milk!**"

Katsuki blinks at the odd gleam in Izuku's eyes, weirded out but a bit flattered by the devotion shown. It's good. Izuku should always think about him, just like Katsuki does. Maybe Katsuki actually did a good job during their childhood and ensnared Deku without meaning to. Maybe Izuku is actually crushing on him-

Hah! Nice dream. Deku's too fucking dense to realize Katsuki's affections.

"Of course," the oblivious idiot continues, crestfallen. "I only know what I do because Kacchan is stubborn about his lifestyle choices. The last I had the chance to observe you, we were only six! Perhaps Kacchan's already changed…"

"Nah," Katsuki interjects, cheeks flooding with pink. "I'm pretty satisfied as I am."

_'But if I could have you, I would be eternally in your debt,' _Katsuki finishes in his mind, rueful that Izuku is so pretty despite being so thickheaded.

When Deku blushes so beautifully, Katsuki can't help but internally sigh at the gorgeous view.

But-

"Oh, there you are!" that fucking chipmunk chirps. Her eyes are big and a warm brown, her eyelashes are long and curved, not to mention her hair looks soft as hell.

Does Deku think Katsuki looks good? Does he?

Katsuki had had a few classmates confess to him in primary school before. But - you know - that was before. Maybe Katsuki actually looks hideous now. Maybe his parents lied to him and he's actually uglier than a homeless beggar of fifty.

Why else would have Deku stared after her when they met?

**_I fucking hate you. Go die, fat bitch._ **

"Get the fuck away," Katsuki growls, leaning back as far he can manage to try and obscure that bitch's vision of Deku. "If you come any closer I'm gonna kill you."

"E - Eh?" she stammers, face slack in confusion. "I - what do you mean?"

"Are you deaf too? I said don't approach. If you come within the two meter radius around me I'll fry you."

"Well," she huffs indignantly. Flipping her bangs, "I wasn't trying to talk to you, anyway."

"Ah," Izuku mumbles, hesitant. "Kacchan, it's okay!"

_Hoe _, don't do it.

She walks straight up to Izuku's space, flustering the small boy into animated gestures. Katsuki gets madder the more that blush covers his face.

**_Bitch. Slut. Both of you. I bet you're enjoying her, Deku. I'll be sure to skin her face into a purse when I'm done with her-_ **

"Oh, Midoriya-san!" a boy cries out, whizzing past Katsuki's desk to Deku. Bowing ninety-degrees, "I am Iida Tenya from Soumei!"

"Ah-"

"I must say," Rectangle Guy continues. "You divined the true nature of the exam, did you not? I judged you wrongfully, you were the better Hero!"

"I - I didn't actually-"

" _Ahem _. Children."

The students turned towards the doorway as a collective.

There's a yellow sleeping bag on the floor, the face of a hobo slapped onto it like a cartoon drawing. But when it begins speaking, Katsuki realizes it's a _real _hobo face.

"It took you eight seconds to pipe down," the hobo grumbles. "Life's too short for your drama. We'll have to deal with that problem."

He stands up, still cocooned in his sleeping bag, reminiscent of a huge caterpillar waking from its hibernation. He pulls the zipper, letting it fall away to reveal a black ensemble.

Then he sucks a juice box.

"Welcome to the department of Heroics," the man mumbles. "I'm your teacher, Aizawa Shouta. Just call me Sensei."

* * *

"I'm sure everyone's participated in physical assessments," Aizawa drones on as he gestures to the wide field spread ahead. "Bakugou, come here."

"Don't order me around," Katsuki grumbles even as he steps up, folding the sleeves of his shirt.

Aizawa rolls his eyes. "Whatever. You came first in the exam, didn't you? Take this ball-" He passes it on. "- and throw it with all your might. Use your Quirk."

Katsuki stares at his teacher.

"Make haste. We don't have all day."

"Tch."

* * *

Katsuki is worried.

Deku is the only one who doesn't have a Quirk, but he's gained enough muscle that he won't be the last. He'll surely surpass that invisible bitch and scrape by.

**_But I'm not happy with that._ **

Katsuki needs him **_out._ **

_Completely. _

**_Expelled, suspended, whatever. Even sending you to General Ed is fine. _**

**_Just not here._ **

**_Stay away from Heroics._ **

From the corner of his sight, he can spot that fucker from the entrance exam, the one who had helped him.

**_That won't work right now._ **

**_What to do, what to do…_ **

**_If it comes to that, make no mistake, Deku. I WILL cripple you. I can take care of you at home, in the basement. Auntie Inko can be dealt with. It doesn't matter if I get expelled. _**

**_I'll do anything._ **

**_Just don't-_ **

_'Wait, the fuck is that?' _he wonders incredulously. Deku, throwing the ball. As if. If he can't win against even the _Grape Fucker _he can't expect to best _Katsuki. _

And when he does as the activity dictated, Katsuki sees that his guess was correct.

**_You aren't good enough to justify being in the Heroics, Deku. _**

**_Back down like an obedient boy and I'll let you make up for your transgressions._ **

It all crumbles when he hears Aizawa's statement.

"I erased your Quirk, Midoriya."

_Ha ha, yeah. _

**_What?_ **

"Did you really think I'd let you injure yourself, just like in the exam?" the teacher asks.

_His eyes are red like blood, and the tattered edges of the carnations Katsuki treasures. _

_His eyes are red like the color that slides over Katsuki's vision. _

_Katsuki's chest roars. His ribs rattle one by one, and his tracheae closes up. Black spots dance around in front of him. _

_His heart _**_quivers._ **

**_What?_ **

"The life of a Hero is filled with countless missions," he says. "There are simply too many to risk your life at each and every one of them. Midoriya Izuku. _You don't belong to UA." _

It's _good. _Isn't it? Izuku is gonna get expelled. Katsuki didn't even need to do anything.

**_My heart hurts._ **

**_What did you do to me, Deku? Why am I wounded?_ **

**_Why did you hide it from me?_ **

**_Why did you pretend?_ **

**_Were you-_ **

Izuku's expression blanks.

Pink, luminescent crackle of lightning wounds tight around his finger; as he draws back, his face screams **_blood._ **

_And when he throws, he screams _**_murder._ **

* * *

_Izuku, in a similar yet completely different narrative, had been in love from the first sight of that cocky child in kindergarten. _

_Bakugou Katsuki. Friend. Acquaintance. Rival. Crush. Childhood friend. The love of his soul. _

_Izuku has many words to describe their relationship, as it evolved through the years and experiences. _

_In the end, it all condensed down to that one name; the one only Izuku has the privilege to use now. _

**_Kacchan._ **

_It doesn't end with this. _

* * *

He hadn't been expecting him to leave right after after the battle simulation.

" _Kacchan!" _Izuku calls out. "Please wait!"

**_Kacchan. What's wrong? Aren't you happy? Why are you leaving?_ **

Izuku knows of Kacchan's pride, he knows it better than most. _But what's the problem? _Kacchan isn't behaving as Izuku expected.

He had been waiting for mirth. What is this? Had he made a miscalculation somewhere? Had he - in his pursuit of Kacchan's acceptance - distanced him instead?

Izuku comes to a stop a few paces away, out of breath. He doubles over, the tears stick to his lashes and drip like crystal fragments.

**_This wasn't what I wanted, Kacchan. I just wanted to make you understand - that I'm HERE! With you! That I'm capable! That I'm worthy of owning you! Why won't you listen to me? Please, talk to me!_ **

"Kacchan," he breathes out, strangled. Tears gone, he raises his head. "I - I thought we were gonna meet?"

"Meet?" Kacchan echoes, turning around. He sneers, " _Meet?" _

The forced smile drops from Izuku's face. He stares, mouth agape.

**_What?_ **

"I'm going home," Kacchan says. With the pause of a few seconds, he continues as if nothing had happened. Izuku stares after him.

**_K - Kacchan?_ **

Kacchan walks away.

**_Where do you think you're going? You're… You're breaking my heart…_ **

**_Don't go. I need you here. Why are you angry at me?_ **

**_Look at me Kacchan._ **

**_Look. _**

**_At. _**

**_Me._ **

**_Kacchan._ **

Quirk. Izuku has to explain his Quirk. Before, there hadn't been any opportunity to breach upon that. Izuku had been meaning to, but-

"My Quirk!" he shouts after him, startling Kacchan. "I got it from - from someone else, Kacchan! It's not mine!"

Kacchan's freezes up. His head whips around, face as if a stone statue.

" _What?" _he asks, puzzled.

Izuku opens his mouth, but Kacchan's faster than him. "Are you stupid?"

"No, wait, _Kacchan-" _

"That's a lie, too," Kacchan snarls, shoulders drawn up like a threatened animal. "You lied to me, all those times! You _lied _to me, Deku!"

"I didn't!" Izuku begs, eyes watering again. "I _never _did! Please, Kacchan!"

"Even now! You're still mocking me, you fucking idiot!"

"I'm not!"

Kacchan doesn't pay him any mind. With one last hiss, he runs away; leaving Izuku to howl behind him, telling him not to go.

* * *

"Oh, Deku," Uraraka coos in in response to his sorrow. Gathering Izuku in her arms, "It's not your fault, Deku. He's just being a moron. You'll see! He'll come begging soon!"

"How - How do you know?" Izuku sniffs, the remains of his sobs still on his face. "Kacchan _never _forgives! _I'll have to -_ **_I'll have to-"_**

Uraraka blanches, slapping Izuku's face with both her hands and snapping him out of his manic thoughts.

" _Deku," _she says, panicking internally. "Bakugou's just **_confused_ ** now. He's feeling _insecure, _he feels as if you've _abandoned _him!"

"I didn't!"

"Well, _we _know that. But he doesn't, right? From what you told me, it looks like he's feeling left out. When was the last time you two talked normally?"

Izuku _tries, _tries _so hard _to come up with something.

_There's_ **_nothing_**_._

"I," he stammers, voice shaking still. He gazes into Uraraka's warm eyes. "I have - _something _to tell. But we can't talk here."

She blinks, then sighs in relief. Nodding, "Okay! Let's go shopping after school today."

* * *

_Kacchan, with his outrageous talents and spitfire confidence, is a beautiful _**_jewel._ **

_Every day, at the backyard of the kindergarten, the children gather to play all sorts of games. The most popular of these is 'Villains Versus Heroes' for the obvious reasons. Now, don't get him wrong. There are other assortments, the oldies like 'Tag' or 'Hide And Seek.' _

_But, as it is, _**_everyone _**_loves 'Villains Versus Heroes.' _

_Izuku does too. _

_He just realizes no one loves _**_him._ **

_"Kacchan!" Haru-kun cries in admiration. "You're so good at games!" _

_"Yeah! Teach us how to play!" _

_"Let's all be friends!" _

**_Friends? _**_Izuku had thought as he froze. _**_What friends? Why are you all ignoring me? Why? Why? Why am I the only one? What did I do wrong? What is the problem?_ **

_"Sure," Kacchan grins; in that easy going, self-assured way that nobody else can replicate. Izuku loves that smile. "After me, everyone!" _

_But, despite the children's dislike of him, Izuku has one advantage he can lord over them at any time. _

_Ryo-chan whines from the very back of the line, "No fair, Kacchan! You always let Deku be the second!" _

_The others nod along, all upset scowls and tears eyes and fragile egos. Izuku can easily puff up, being able to put up with their daily snubbing. _

_"Huh? I don't care. Deku may be useless but he's still my friend, got that?" _

_"Aw!" _

_They set out for a mission across the woods near their neighborhood, the paths crisscrossing in swirling patterns of mysterious foliage. From the views of four-year-olds, it's enough to stimulate dreams of magical worlds and legendary swords. With the accompaniment of Kacchan's fired-up encouragement, all of them gladly pass through the strange pathway in the forest. _

_Beyond the trees lies a fresh, fast-flowing river and a water creek. There is a miniature waterfall, a makeshift bridge of tree log put upon it. _

_Kacchan, of course, is faithful that he can do anything in this world. He can traverse across a log just as swiftly as he can a crosswalk. _

_"Follow me!" he demands, in that same childish voice that has always plagued Izuku's dreams. _

_Needless to say, too much confidence seems to jinx Fate's sure plans. _

_Izuku screeches in horror, watching Katsuki fall down, down, down, _**_and down-_ **

_The splash shocks everyone into shouting. _

_Among them all, there are those that cry out in astonishment, those that laugh like silly at the occurrence, those that don't care at all and yell 'Hurry up, Kacchan!' _

_Izuku does no such thing. _

_Izuku is _**_loving. _**_He is _**_kind. _**_Most of all, he is _**_actively _**_helpful; so he's the one that gets a hold of the hard wooden surface and lets his small body slip down into the river, right beside Kacchan's figure. _

_"Kacchan!" he shrieks. "Are you okay?" _

_And he offers his hand; lovingly, kindly, patiently. _

* * *

_Izuku feels. _

_He feels but he doesn't _**_know._ **

_All day, he watches those miserable maggots crawl around Kacchan's magnificent light, and _**_wonders._ **

**_Why? _**_goes through his mind, flashing through his empty eyes. _**_Why? Why? Why am I the only one? What did I do wrong? What is the problem?_ **

**_Why, Kacchan?_ **

**_Do you hate me so?_ **

**_What will it take for you to look at me?_ **

_Without warning, one day, suddenly, they turn more malicious than he had ever anticipated. _

**_Aren't I the one who deserves it the most?_ **

**_You give your attention and regard so freely to these vermin, and yet-_ **

**_And yet-_ **

_It is with that determination he walks up to his _**_friendacquaintancerivalcrushchildhoodfriend the love of his soul-_ **

_And demands his right. _

_"Kacchan," he says, mouth downturned in a way it has never been before; chest burning in desire for blood, pain, suffering, raw flesh, _**_viscera-_ **

_He smiles, so cold that he can feel his smile slip right off. "Mom wants you to come over to play." _

_"Huh?" Kacchan deadpans with confusion. "Why?" _

_"A play date." _

_The beloved rolls his eyes. "She could have called my mom. Whatever. When's it?" _

**_Ah, _**_muses Izuku in pleasure. _**_You still want me, don't you, Kacchan? _**

_With the thumps his heart makes, Izuku loves _**_lovingly, kindly, patiently._ **

**_Kacchan._ **

**_You still belong to me._ **

**_Don't you?_ **

* * *

**_Hey y'all! Im sorry to have neglected the ffnet-only folks! I've been a lot more productive on ao3, and nearly forgot i had this account at all. Needless to say, I have all the major updates and things on that site, so i advice going there and looking for _**_"Snowy_Rain" **which is my username. I post little plotbunny-oneshots there as well, not to mention my new smut fic and this OPM smut i've been co-writing with ehehehehe :P**_

_**OH! And! This fic has a sequel-sort-of little unconnected (but still mutual yandere) smut vignettes collection named "Insomnia", only available on AO3! (Warning: Somnophilia, Explicit sexual language, Non-Con, possibly Gore and etc.)**_


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